I live in Wisconsin. And it's cold. You'd think that it wouldn't come as a surprise to me that it's cold since I've lived here as long as I have... but there is no way to prepare for that moment when you walk out of the house and are hit with that first blast of cold arctic air. I do have an indoor/outdoor thermometer which I usually remember to check each morning. It helps me to determine the amount of nagging I have to do in order to make sure the kids' extremities are covered and/or how lenient I can be without bordering on child neglect when it's cold. I saw 10 degrees on the thermometer and cringed. Being that it's the first day back to school since winter break started, we were all kind of cranky to begin with. To be forced to brave the elements on the same day was a cruel cold winter joke. We've been spoiled with temperatures in the 30's and even 40's so far with no snow. NO SNOW! Until Sunday, that is. We got an inch or two of snow and then it got so cold that it's mostly ice now. It'll be back into the 40's this week, which again... very strange. We had green grass up until the weekend. Did I mention that it's January? And that I live in Wisconsin? I know that you didn't come here to get a weather report though.
Do you remember a show called Starting Over on CBS about 10 years ago? Wait. It was on NBC about 7 years ago. Close enough. Annnyway.... It was a show were a bunch of women live in a house together and work with a life coach. They all have different issues they deal with. One of the women of the second season (I think?) was one of the Braxton sisters. She was working on a goal to become more authentic. I used to wonder what the hell that meant. More authentic? So... more... you? You are who you are. You can't be anything but who you are. Right? Some people say that the true person you are is the way you are when you are alone. But aren't you the person you are with others as well? I don't get the concept of being "authentic" because no matter what, you're as you as you can get. That being said, I've been in situations this last year where I'll be doing something or saying something and think, "Do I look like I know what I'm talking about? I feel powerful. I feel like an adult. I feel important." Yet at the same time it'll feel like I'm playing the role and not really being powerful or important. Does that make sense? It's almost like I'm thinking about my body language, expressions, and wondering how I present myself at that moment because I want to be seen as an adult and like I know what I'm doing. Does everyone do that? I don't know if I'm making much sense. I get so enthusiastic about feeling important or grown up that maybe I come across as too willing to be in a leadership role? I sometimes want the title or recognition so much that I forget there is real work that goes along with that. Then I get overwhelmed or I lose interest and I don't do what I agreed to do.
Maybe I am trying to say that I don't feel authentic. Maybe I feel fake. But feeling those things and that way still makes me... me. If anyone reads this and understands, e-mail me. I could use a pat on the head.
I have so much that I want to write about but it's almost 1:30 in the morning and I have things I have to do before I sleep yet.
Is anyone reading this?
Tuesday, January 3, 2012
Monday, January 2, 2012
A new year, a new blog.
Yes. Add me to the ever-growing list of people who have resolved to write that ONE blog which will draw readers in on a daily basis. The ONE blog about their life, the daily drama, and all the words of wisdom they offer. The ONE blog above all other blogs. You know.... That blog everyone hates. It looks down upon your blog and you read it only to see if something bad happened to it lately.
The.One.Blog.
Actually, I'll admit that I want to write a kickass blog. Who doesn't?! You see it all the time. People get paid to write about stuff in their blogs. People actually make money writing blogs!!! That would be incredible and I want to be that person. But mostly, I know how nosy I am and how I love seeing what other people's lives are like. I want dirt. I want to know that when I'm sitting on the couch crying because some fictional character on television screws up, I'm not the only one crying. Yes, I know it's fiction. BUT THAT WAS MESSED UP!
Look. I'm not superhuman. I'm not the CEO of some new and necessary company. I'm a wife and mom. I volunteer, I'm crafty, and I think I have a great sense of humor. I'm also bipolar and overweight. So what do I have to offer the internet? Why should you read my blog?
Because you're nosy too. It's ok! Isn't that why the internet is so amazing? You hear a friend talking about a celebrity who said something really horrible about another celebrity. So you Google it and get all the dirt. You hear somebody hint at a wardrobe malfunction by somebody famous. Google it and there you have the pictures. What was that? They might be getting divorced?! Google it and there's the latest gossip and breakdown of the divorce papers. Wonder what your high school ex is doing now? Google it and... hey! He actually turned out normal and I might even get along with his wife. I wonder what is growing in the back of my neighbor's yard.... Google Earth brings you to street level and there you have it.
See where I'm going with this? I'm going to share (almost) every detail of my daily life with you. I'll save you the Google searches and offer up the dirt for free. Why would I want to do this? Because for a few years, I've convinced myself that every other wife and Mom has no clue what I'm going through. I'm pretty sure that everyone has a cleaner house than me. I think everyone is having way more sex than me. I am the only woman who has tried FlyLady's methods more than 3 times and still failed. I am the only woman to have just discovered RumChata and pudding shots. I am, right?
I'm going to post about my life. I'm going to share with you what I'm trying to fix, how I'm trying to fix it, what works, what doesn't, recipes, craft ideas, things which inspire me, things which anger me, things which make me smile, and things I need to have explained to me. I hope that as you read my blog, you find that I make you laugh, smile, nod your head in agreement, or help you to not feel like you're the one woman on the face of the earth with that challenge or thought. I'm not perfect, and I'm not great with grammar or spelling. It's ok. I've come to terms with that. I hope you don't mind.
Happy New Year and welcome to 365 Days of Suburban Survival
The.One.Blog.
Actually, I'll admit that I want to write a kickass blog. Who doesn't?! You see it all the time. People get paid to write about stuff in their blogs. People actually make money writing blogs!!! That would be incredible and I want to be that person. But mostly, I know how nosy I am and how I love seeing what other people's lives are like. I want dirt. I want to know that when I'm sitting on the couch crying because some fictional character on television screws up, I'm not the only one crying. Yes, I know it's fiction. BUT THAT WAS MESSED UP!
Look. I'm not superhuman. I'm not the CEO of some new and necessary company. I'm a wife and mom. I volunteer, I'm crafty, and I think I have a great sense of humor. I'm also bipolar and overweight. So what do I have to offer the internet? Why should you read my blog?
Because you're nosy too. It's ok! Isn't that why the internet is so amazing? You hear a friend talking about a celebrity who said something really horrible about another celebrity. So you Google it and get all the dirt. You hear somebody hint at a wardrobe malfunction by somebody famous. Google it and there you have the pictures. What was that? They might be getting divorced?! Google it and there's the latest gossip and breakdown of the divorce papers. Wonder what your high school ex is doing now? Google it and... hey! He actually turned out normal and I might even get along with his wife. I wonder what is growing in the back of my neighbor's yard.... Google Earth brings you to street level and there you have it.
See where I'm going with this? I'm going to share (almost) every detail of my daily life with you. I'll save you the Google searches and offer up the dirt for free. Why would I want to do this? Because for a few years, I've convinced myself that every other wife and Mom has no clue what I'm going through. I'm pretty sure that everyone has a cleaner house than me. I think everyone is having way more sex than me. I am the only woman who has tried FlyLady's methods more than 3 times and still failed. I am the only woman to have just discovered RumChata and pudding shots. I am, right?
I'm going to post about my life. I'm going to share with you what I'm trying to fix, how I'm trying to fix it, what works, what doesn't, recipes, craft ideas, things which inspire me, things which anger me, things which make me smile, and things I need to have explained to me. I hope that as you read my blog, you find that I make you laugh, smile, nod your head in agreement, or help you to not feel like you're the one woman on the face of the earth with that challenge or thought. I'm not perfect, and I'm not great with grammar or spelling. It's ok. I've come to terms with that. I hope you don't mind.
Happy New Year and welcome to 365 Days of Suburban Survival
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